Lost for words- yes, that’s what he was feeling at that particular instant. He had been an eloquent speaker throughout his life- yet at the time when he was needed to say some words, he just couldn’t; for they had no meanings for him anymore. He wondered- he thought- he pondered upon things surrounding him but nothing came off. He could feel the glaring eyes of people which had a has-he-lost-it expression written all over them. Yet, he felt so oblivious to them- so numb- so forgetful of them. How could he- he tried to think about it because it was one thing he had never thought that he would do.
He always wanted freedom- freedom of speech- freedom of thought- freedom of soul- freedom from life itself. But everything seemed so irrelevant and relative right now for he had gained the freedom but lost the words, the thoughts, the soul and the life he had always wished for. Ironical- yes it does sound ironical. He was an advocate of freedom for crying out loud; and here he was, finally with the choice to say things he always wanted to, but not able to do so. Why? Everyone in the large hall room was thinking the same thing- Why?
He wished for things that never took place- he wished for things that never existed- he wished for life that never was real- yet he wished for death at the same time. With contradiction and conflict all around- he was lost in the abyss of cognition- yet he knew nothing. Blasphemy- he was accused of it once. Now God gave him the chance to rectify things- to tell the world that he was not an agnostic- to let people know that he was not an atheist- to speak out loud what he really meant in his writings against religion or the practices that he carried out.
Nothing spoken- utter silence- engulfing the huge hall like the light from the chandelier surrounded the whole arena. A sudden outburst of tears- tears flowing from his eyes- tears of regret- tears of sorrow- tears of joy even. A sudden mumbling hymn coming from the rows of the church they were in. They all felt that he regretted what he had done- these tears were a way to apologize for what he had done. Nothing said- nothing done- just a silent enigma- this man was turning out to be.
Salvation- they were all here for salvation. The mumbles had turned into loud recitation of bible- the bells had started ringing- the bishop standing high- people lost in the euphoria of it all. The man was about to be declared sinner for the rest of his life- and was to be abandoned by everyone. People wanted him to accept his blasphemous behavior- yet he was not ready. He was still silent- as silent as a cold winter night in the Atlantic. And there it was- the decision of “God” to abandon this guy.
His crime- he did not believe in God- or he was not convinced about it- he was confused- Why? Because if there was any God present than He would make sure that every human being was treated equally in this world. This man described religion as the tool to oppress and create classes. He wanted his children to go to the same school where children of billionaires go to. But he was a sinner- and sinners deserve to go to hell. So, hell it is going to be for him.
The man grabbed the candle stand from a shelf near him and stuck it into his heart. Blood- running down the isle of the church.
Freedom; he wished for- and freedom; he got.
He always wanted freedom- freedom of speech- freedom of thought- freedom of soul- freedom from life itself. But everything seemed so irrelevant and relative right now for he had gained the freedom but lost the words, the thoughts, the soul and the life he had always wished for. Ironical- yes it does sound ironical. He was an advocate of freedom for crying out loud; and here he was, finally with the choice to say things he always wanted to, but not able to do so. Why? Everyone in the large hall room was thinking the same thing- Why?
He wished for things that never took place- he wished for things that never existed- he wished for life that never was real- yet he wished for death at the same time. With contradiction and conflict all around- he was lost in the abyss of cognition- yet he knew nothing. Blasphemy- he was accused of it once. Now God gave him the chance to rectify things- to tell the world that he was not an agnostic- to let people know that he was not an atheist- to speak out loud what he really meant in his writings against religion or the practices that he carried out.
Nothing spoken- utter silence- engulfing the huge hall like the light from the chandelier surrounded the whole arena. A sudden outburst of tears- tears flowing from his eyes- tears of regret- tears of sorrow- tears of joy even. A sudden mumbling hymn coming from the rows of the church they were in. They all felt that he regretted what he had done- these tears were a way to apologize for what he had done. Nothing said- nothing done- just a silent enigma- this man was turning out to be.
Salvation- they were all here for salvation. The mumbles had turned into loud recitation of bible- the bells had started ringing- the bishop standing high- people lost in the euphoria of it all. The man was about to be declared sinner for the rest of his life- and was to be abandoned by everyone. People wanted him to accept his blasphemous behavior- yet he was not ready. He was still silent- as silent as a cold winter night in the Atlantic. And there it was- the decision of “God” to abandon this guy.
His crime- he did not believe in God- or he was not convinced about it- he was confused- Why? Because if there was any God present than He would make sure that every human being was treated equally in this world. This man described religion as the tool to oppress and create classes. He wanted his children to go to the same school where children of billionaires go to. But he was a sinner- and sinners deserve to go to hell. So, hell it is going to be for him.
The man grabbed the candle stand from a shelf near him and stuck it into his heart. Blood- running down the isle of the church.
Freedom; he wished for- and freedom; he got.
