Silence

Silence. Complete silence encompassing every corner of the sea- a sea of hope and promise, a sea heralding the felicity. A part of the vast ocean filled with the water flowing down from the streams of tears, having their source in the glaciers of a battered mind. I am so worthless for I have tried to escape this silence- I have tried. I have tried to challenge the gigantic waves of this gargantuan ocean- I have. The island of success would never come closer; never close enough for me to fight away my fears.

Yet I started my journey- a journey, which I knew, won’t take me anywhere. But I had to put my courage to test. I just had to. The path was not easy, but I was not going to surrender. Hope was the foundation upon which I was building my empire of dreams. Dreams that might not appear to be of much importance to a normal person, but they were everything to me.

Hoping that one-day they’re going to reach the shores of realism. Expecting that all the dreams, all the fantasies will turn into reality. I jumped into this unfathomable ocean. Fighting against all odds, combating my own fears, defending the castle of my dreams. I was not going to hold back. The first sign of life I saw was a bird- a bird that was flying up so high. A bird filled with love, flying far away from me. I was avid; I needed something to fill my appetite for atonement.

Thunder. Thunder that broke the silence. Lightning crashed into that little bird. It fell right next to me. It was alive- alive and even more energetic and vibrant than me. It gave me strength- strength to fight the waves, strength to wipe away my tears. It made me realize- a realization of the verve I had, a realization that I could make it through all the ups and downs of my life.

Water came down from the clouds of contentment, water that washed heartrending thoughts away from my mind. I felt I was someone else, I felt complete, I felt contented.

Clock kept on ticking. Time was moving forward, or was it? Wasn’t the time moving backwards and we budging forward? Time… Time was going to change the course of my existence. For the first time I felt that I could make it. Was I wrong? Was I dreaming? I didn’t know. I just kept on augmenting my vigor from that bird- the bird that had taught me how to realize my dreams, how to defend them, how to find the islands of success. With winds pushing me away from the shores, with thunders deafening me, with lightning making me blind, I continued because I knew I had that bird.

That bird became my friend, my cohort, and my companion. It was my strength. It was my verve. It was my reason of existence. If it were not for that bird, I would have lost hope. I kept on trying, kept on moving. I could see the shores of realism right ahead. Was it an illusion? I hoped it wasn’t. Hope was the only thing that bound that bird and me together. We were so close to reality yet so far. Time was running out. Thunders were louder. Lightning was crashing. Windstorms were gaining strength.

I was not ready to give up but the bird just could not weather the storm- a storm that had united us- a storm that had awakened me- a storm that had given me hope that I could make it. It had left. It had left me amidst the cruel world of my own imagination. It had made me realize that I could not make it. It had betrayed me. It had given up on our dreams. It had made reality seem far away. It had lost me in the ocean of imagination. It had…

Lightning crashed and I was alone again. I was awake. I had given up on my dreams, aspirations, and fantasies. I had lost. I had realized that dreams never existed, that love never existed and that time never existed. It had made me realize that I did not exist- I was not the same person anymore. I was not I. I was mere chimera of what used to be reality. I was dead.

Silence. Silence again…